It hurts.

This feeling really bites. I hate feeling this way. I hate my decision, but it had to be done.

You only ever hear or see the things that happened to me... in the movies.

When it really does happen...you keep pinching yourself to remind yourself you're awake.

I've finally gotten off my rollercoaster ride, which had volatile peaks and troughs. A ride which went through one blind corner through another. Hoping that I'd catch a glimpse of the next one. I never did. Everytime i kept thinking that the next bend is going to be the worst one ever...I find out that it's Much Much worse than i could've ever imagined.

Why does it have to be this way? Was there something i could've done to make things better?

Fuck.

Oh well...there must be a lesson behind this somehow.

I hope i'll be able to see it someday.

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